mylittlejamjar | [Visual/Action]

[Because nothing says hello like a big, dumb bear face on the scroll, the visual starts off with some sort of...mascot costume looking right into the feed. It's obviously a costume, what with the giant zipper that's pretty hard to miss. He then speaks in the most annoying voice imaginable, so enjoy that.]

What the heck?! This map's all blank!

[He opens and closes the scroll several times before realizing that isn't going to change anything. Bummer.]

What a ripoff! What kinda amusement park just gives you a blank map?! Now how am I suppose to find all the neato roller coasters and spinny cups?

[He shakes his head, clearly frustrated by the laziness of these people. ...Whoever these people are.]

Grr, looks like I'm gonna have to fill it in myself... A super map exbearation!

[He pumps his fist, taking this new task he just gave himself very seriously. Never mind he has no idea where he is, why he's suddenly in an amusement park of all things, nor does he take notice he's like half his original size. THERE ARE GIANT TEA CUPS ON THE LINE, PEOPLE.]

I'm gonna need some crayons.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Sounds like you're in the wrong place! But I don't blame you for thinking it's an amusement park, it really does like one..

Now, I could point you in the right direction, but hopefully someone already explained everything to you?

[What's that? Someone trying to help? Teddie knows just what to do when someone offers helpful advise.

Throw it out the window.]

Woah-ho! I am likin' your hair, mister!

Why, thank you! [That's ok! Flattery is always appreciated.]

Nice... costume? [Sudden upturn into a question because you can't be 100% sure of anything in Ponyland.]

Tch.

[He's trying to sound cool. That's the sound Kanji always makes, anyway.]

This isn't some run of the mill cheapo costume, buddy. This is 100% authentic Teddie fur!

I can see the zipper.

[...]

It's for keeping my head on!

So if you unzip it, would it kill you?

[GRUESOME]

...Thankfully not!

[Or else Yosuke would have killed him long ago, oops.]

But that hasn't been a problem for a super long time, I'm not empty anymore~

[Said with all the pride in the world. ...Take it as you will.]

How... nice? [Hang on, what?]

Lemme try and get this straight. You're not empty anymore, but you were before? Is that what you're saying?

Absolutely pawsitively!

[He beams.]

...Just don't tell anybody, got it? It's a secret.

[Because if you tell someone something's a secret, it's okay to tell them. Genius.]

I've got it. Posit-utely!

You wouldn't mind showing me, would you? I'm just curious, is all. I can tell you're not a horse- or horse shaped, for that matter, or the costume would've been all messed up.

[Teddie jumps, apparently startled by his request.]

W-WHAT?! D-Did you just ask me to undress for you?!

[He holds his massive face with one of his paws, as if contemplating this sudden situation.]

My Teddie charm's really on the ball today. I never knew it was this powerful...

Oh, for the love of-! I'm not asking you to be indecent, I just wanted to see your face!

[We're not at that point in the relationship yet.]

What's wrong with my face?

[But he takes it off anything, popping it off without even touching the zipper. It's like why even have it.

Of course, inside the egg-shaped suit isn't his usual human body, but instead a tiny bear replica. Complete with fabulous hair and temporary sparkles. Everything but pants, really...]

[So it's a bear. Inside of a bear suit. Like a russian nesting bear.]

...That is so cute.

[OOP, was that out loud?]

I knooooow~

[He appreciates his honestly.]

Although I used to have pants. I dunno what the heck is up with this place and its weird pants grudge. I can see everyone's bear behinds!

[And that's gross.]

[shrug]

Maybe it's a no-human, no-pants planet?

That's not an excuse to go around all naked!

[And then, an idea.]

...This must be my destiny. I need to bring pants to these poor pony people!

...I can't imagine it'd catch on. Can you imagine how hard they'd be to put on?

Edited 2014-05-15 04:02 (UTC)

...Nope!

[But it might be because he can stand on his hind legs.]

But if you're gonna be a big whiner about it, I can always slap on some extra zippers.

[ZIPPERS MAKE EVERYTHING EASIER.]

That's not the problem, you realize? Ponies can't even reach back there!

So what you're saying is...

I should invent a pants-putting-oner robot for all my future customers!

[He could give it claw hands, or even better, drill arms.]

[If he heard that thought he'd yell at you. But as it stands, he thinks about the prospect.]

I could build one of those. But again, I doubt anybody'd be interested...

[Do not kill his dreams about drill arms, man. Bears dig drill arms.]

Y-You can make robots? Pants-related robots?!

I can make any kind of robot! But yes, I could make those pants ones...

If I wanted to.

[Visual]

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