Witness the POWER OF AN OVERLORD! [Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Darkness shot through with flames! Billowing clouds with rumbling lightning deep inside! Then rising up into view, the silhouetted form of Zetta, his powerful body looming over the scroll as he glares down into it, blank white eyes shining and a malicious grin on his face.]

[...yeah, he was always like this, but he's been watching Trixie's shows to get a handle on the magic involved...]

Hyaaa ha ha ha ha! Tremble with terror and respect, Ponyville, for I, Zetta, the most badass freaking Overlord in the cosmos, have come to give you a lecture on how the multiverse works!

[The clouds and flames and lightning and stuff puff away like they'd been hit with a strong breeze. Zetta, of course, retains his flaming mane and blank eyes. Those are, alarmingly, natural.]

Just my luck I'd end up someplace where no one understands a thing about ANYthing, so hopefully this will clear up some misconceptions about the whole Overlord thing. Normally I leave the opening narrations to Pram, so you should all be freaking grateful I'm doing this.

[With his horn glowing a deep purple, Zetta pulls up a piece of paper with a crayon image on it: a deep black space with lots of little spheres on it. Zetta leans into the image, tapping this picture with a pointy stick.]

There is, of course, more than one universe. Your planet here is just one backwater speck in some pointless galaxy in some lesser existence. But the uselessness of your world isn't the point here. The point is...

[The picture flutters away, replaced by another -- this one featuring a gothic tower, an Earth-like world, and (way off in the corner) a stupid-looking angel with Xs for eyes.]

Every universe has three important things. The one we care about is this one. [The stick points to the tower.] The Netherworld is the world of demons, the source of all evil in the cosmos... well, all the evil that matters anyway. The darkness in people's hearts and man's inhumanity to man and all that crap we're ignoring. This is the good kind of evil. Murder. Arson. Theft. Excessive Violence. Unwanted Destruction. Skipping School. Jaywalking with Intent to Loiter. Internet Piracy. What you call crime, we demons call daily life.

For the sake of completion, I'll add that every cosmos has a human world, for the sake of the inevitable dramatic comparisons of how demons and humans aren't that different and all that crap, and the world of good and light, which is called... [Zetta groans, slumps a little, and shuts his eyes.] Celestia. It's a freaking COINCIDENCE, people, don't read too much into it. It's a relatively common word! But that's not the point!

[The picture flutters away, replaced by another -- this one showing a stick figure with mighty, bulging muscles and flaming hair standing above a bunch of other stick figures (and what appears to be a penguin).]

Every Netherworld has a ruler, and that ruler is the Overlord. There's only one way to get the position of Overlord: you beat the demon who has the title. In other words, the Overlord is the strongest demon in the Netherworld. The strongest being in that universe, in fact. You want a guess at how strong they are, imagine something powerful enough to challenge your beloved princess and walk away mostly unharmed -- after mowing through all of you who threw yourselves in the way to protect her without a scratch.

But back to our cosmos. [The first picture returns.] Remember how I said there's more than one universe? That means there's lots of Overlords -- one for every Netherworld. Naturally, one of the jobs of the Overlord is to deal with other Overlords, which, since we're demons, usually involves gratuitous amounts of violence.

So what's the point? [Zetta tosses the picture and the stick away, then turns to face the scroll head-on. Purple light begins to gather not just around his horn, but all over his frame.] The point is that I, Zetta, am the strongest Overlord in the cosmos. Unquestioned, undisputed, acknowledged by all former contenders to that title!

[The power around Zetta becomes such that it begins to coruscate, flaring out and in as beams stab out from its core.]

I am the most badass freaking Overlord there is!

AND I SHALL CONQUER YOUR WORLD THE WAY I HAVE CONQUERED COUNTLESS WORLDS BEFORE IT! SOON, EQUESTRIA WILL BE THE HEART OF A NEW NETHERWORLD! HYAAAAA HA HA HA HA!

[The energy vanishes abruptly, the power outflow cuts off like a choked hose, and suddenly all is normal once again.]

On a related note, as thanks to Trixie for publicizing my amazing presence here, I'd like to encourage you all to go see her show. And hey Trix, if you're listening, that one yesterday was freaking sweet.