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mylittlejamjar2014-10-18 07:59 pm
surpriserainbows) wrote in mylittlejamjar2014-10-18 07:59 pm
13th Distraction - Visual
So. You're probably wondering why I have a dog in a banana costume.
[It would, Surprise supposes, be a thing most would wonder, as there is indeed a dog, a dachshund to be specific, slowly waltzing about around her while dressed in a small, bright yellow banana costume.]
First, uh...I should probably apologize for how I was this time of year last year. I...Nightmare Night isn't exactly something I look forward to. I guess...I mean I know the war that came from it didn't seem to affect this Equestria or maybe most like it did mine. I mean, you know, I'm not sure why that is, since you'd think a war would leave lasting scars on a social conscious no matter where it happens, right!?
But hey let's not talk about war and the lasting damage it does to society! Let's talk about war and why we dress dogs up in remembrance of it! Or, uh, traditions for Nightmare Night I guess. I think how the war happened in my world is different from most so I'm gonna explain a few things.
So about a thousand years ago, the Princesses took an initiative to be more open with the public, including saying they were willing to hear any suggestions their citizens had. It's not known how it started, but legend has it that someone requested that Celestia dress in a banana costume. It seemed to start as a joke, but eventually it got a lot of support somehow. Apparently everyone just kind of loved it.
In response Princess Celestia decided to end the initiative and destroyed a small settlement she thought the request came from. Princess Luna, however, wanted to keep the initiative going and pushed for Celestia to wear the banana costume to appease the public. She tried to push it everywhere she could, and eventually tried to slip it into the fiscal budget plan for the coming year to force it.
When that didn't work, Princess Luna did the only thing she could to try and get Celestia to acquiesce to her demand: she sold her sanity to the dark gods that lay on the fringes of reality and proceeded to bombard Canterlot with dark magic, leading to her banishment to the moon and a century long ban on fruit based costumes.
And so, in my Equestria today, we remember this horrific war that still shatters families and friends apart in two specific ways. The first is the burning of all fiscal yearly budget reports, although that's...you know, it's kind of been going out of style considering all the damage it does to the economy. The second is the dressing up of dogs in banana costumes.
I...I'm not really clear on why we do it to dogs specifically, man, the history is kind of hazy. I know that like three hundred years back some pony scientists tried to shoot a bunch of dogs dressed in banana costumes to the moon, but you know, it just kind of ended up raining costumed dogs for a day instead.
So, uh. Other than the usual trick or treating, that's how and why we celebrate Nightmare Night!
[The dachshund, meanwhile, is still waddling about a bit before managing to trip over a bit of the costume somehow.]
Oh, yeah. Is anypony missing a dog or something named Jellybeans? Because I found it.
[It would, Surprise supposes, be a thing most would wonder, as there is indeed a dog, a dachshund to be specific, slowly waltzing about around her while dressed in a small, bright yellow banana costume.]
First, uh...I should probably apologize for how I was this time of year last year. I...Nightmare Night isn't exactly something I look forward to. I guess...I mean I know the war that came from it didn't seem to affect this Equestria or maybe most like it did mine. I mean, you know, I'm not sure why that is, since you'd think a war would leave lasting scars on a social conscious no matter where it happens, right!?
But hey let's not talk about war and the lasting damage it does to society! Let's talk about war and why we dress dogs up in remembrance of it! Or, uh, traditions for Nightmare Night I guess. I think how the war happened in my world is different from most so I'm gonna explain a few things.
So about a thousand years ago, the Princesses took an initiative to be more open with the public, including saying they were willing to hear any suggestions their citizens had. It's not known how it started, but legend has it that someone requested that Celestia dress in a banana costume. It seemed to start as a joke, but eventually it got a lot of support somehow. Apparently everyone just kind of loved it.
In response Princess Celestia decided to end the initiative and destroyed a small settlement she thought the request came from. Princess Luna, however, wanted to keep the initiative going and pushed for Celestia to wear the banana costume to appease the public. She tried to push it everywhere she could, and eventually tried to slip it into the fiscal budget plan for the coming year to force it.
When that didn't work, Princess Luna did the only thing she could to try and get Celestia to acquiesce to her demand: she sold her sanity to the dark gods that lay on the fringes of reality and proceeded to bombard Canterlot with dark magic, leading to her banishment to the moon and a century long ban on fruit based costumes.
And so, in my Equestria today, we remember this horrific war that still shatters families and friends apart in two specific ways. The first is the burning of all fiscal yearly budget reports, although that's...you know, it's kind of been going out of style considering all the damage it does to the economy. The second is the dressing up of dogs in banana costumes.
I...I'm not really clear on why we do it to dogs specifically, man, the history is kind of hazy. I know that like three hundred years back some pony scientists tried to shoot a bunch of dogs dressed in banana costumes to the moon, but you know, it just kind of ended up raining costumed dogs for a day instead.
So, uh. Other than the usual trick or treating, that's how and why we celebrate Nightmare Night!
[The dachshund, meanwhile, is still waddling about a bit before managing to trip over a bit of the costume somehow.]
Oh, yeah. Is anypony missing a dog or something named Jellybeans? Because I found it.
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What.
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I mean you probably look at a grandma crossing the street and think about going to help her. I look at a grandma trying to cross the street and wondering what horrible secrets she's hiding and where she might try and hide my body.
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Ain't gettin' anywhere fast, but I'm tryin'.
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I still dunno if that's part of the consorting with dark gods thing or just their nature. I guess it doesn't matter too much it's just one of those little things.
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Otherwise, we may have a problem.
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Iiiii....can't really promise that? I mean it has a pretty good chance it won't happen here, I mean my Equestria is kind of different man. But uh...with the way some things been going here I wouldn't be too surprised.
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More 'n more I swear Peacock'd love it here. Really, this just cements it.
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This? All of this? This goes way beyond my weirdness tolerance!
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Just gotta take some time to take it all in.