mylittlejamjar | First Licorice [Visual, postdated to after the event]

Hello, everypony. Some of you may not recognize me from around town, which is fair... I only just got one of these scrolls. My name is Bon Bon, and yes, that means I'm the one who runs the candy shop downtown. Either way, I've got a few announcements to make, now that the nasty business with the eclipses is over.

Firstly: Since it's only a month until Nightmare Night, I'm accepting suggestions for varieties of candy to make for the big day-before sale. Last year's celebrations being cut short by the actual Nightmare Moon I entirely blame on my stocking of way too much black licorice, so I want to know if you all can help make the holiday not a catastrophic failure this year.

Secondly: thanks to that eclipse, I actually do have a bit of a surplus here, so until the end of the month, all taffy is 75% off. Something to chew on for a while. [The mare chuckles, quietly, at her own joke.]

Finally: Until further notice, Zetta and all of those who collaborated with him are blacklisted from the Sugar Shack. I understand that it was apparently some super-secret plan to lure out the evil mastermind keeping all of the offworlders here, but you caused Lyra and Fluttershy to work themselves into exhaustion, made one of my employees sick, and turned the other into a bear! [Yes, Zetta, she's blaming you for that too even if it happened after the fact. And was technically Teddie's fault.] If you want me to lift the ban, then I'm expecting a pretty big apology. Yes, your majesties, that includes you two, too. I'm a businessmare, not a politician, and you hurt my bottom line, so I have to take action.

Thank you all for your time.

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[Private to Dame Trixie]

Trixie? I wanted to thank you for pulling Fluttershy and Lyra out of that mess. There was only so much I could do at the time, and... yeah. Thanks.

That said, maybe it'd be best if you don't talk to Lyra about the version of her you know just yet. She's getting capital-i Ideas, and she needs time to rest before she starts getting more and ending up right back where she was.

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[Private to Kyouko and Teddie]

Kyouko, Theodore.

Just so you know, I'm still gonna need you guys to come in tomorrow. I know it's a really stressful time, but if there's one thing I've learned in life it's that you've got to roll with what life throws at you. If nothing else, a day at the shop might be a good way to help Kyouko learn how to... [she hesitates, before glancing aside and coughing into a hoof.]...bear it, maybe.

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[Private to Lyra and OU!Shy]

You two are on strict bed rest orders for the next week. Doctor Bon's orders.

If you two so much as think of sneaking out on me or not getting the rest you need, you're on poison joke harvesting duty for a month. And I'll figure out a way for you to have to do it without your unicorn magic, too.

I'm serious. Equestria is okay now, get some sleep.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So those are our only options? Be abused or be eaten?

Mister, I don't like how narrowminded you're acting. And if you're assuming I speak for all of Equestria, can I assume you're speaking for Princess Celestia and Princess Luna?

My plan came as close to working as it can be without us winning. How's your 'openness and helpfulness' crap working out on that score?

I don't know, because I don't see a whole lot of helpfulness. I see ponies fighting ponies, ponies fighting not-ponies, Hoovesweek fighting everyone.

Mind telling me how friendship is supposed to work if nobody actually tries?

Look. I'll give credit where it's due. The entire reason the plan worked is because you and the Princesses worked together. Maybe if everypony worked together, it would have worked a whole lot better, don't you think?

Edited 2014-09-21 04:12 (UTC)

I'm just a demon. I don't know a damn thing about friendship.

But forming an alliance with your enemy to fight a greater evil is undemonic enough to be worth something in that venue, I'm guessing.

Yeah.

Just... next time, things heed to be more careful. I think we may need to play whack-a-mole.

You have no damn idea how 'careful' the Princesses made me be during all of this, so don't start.

...You know, back before I got a scroll, everypony told me you were really intent on being taken seriously.

Now that you are, you're acting like I'm oppressing you.

Which is it?

I'm saying you're being a jerk. That's all.

You get back what you put in. Honestly, the way you picked on others I'm surprised more people aren't standing up to it.

[Guess who still remembers Fluttershy? And the puppy kicking? And, well. All the incredibly petty stuff. Don't need to be a demonic overlord to be petty, you know.]

So ponies aren't better than demons, then?

Who knows? I've never met a demon, aside from you and Alastor.

And aside from you being a jerk - granted, a really powerful jerk but still a jerk - you don't seem too different from a pony.

Why would I say we're better?

Ponies always talk up friendship and getting together and love and all that crap. So it's just talk?

You always talk up evil and wicked deeds and hurting others and all that.

Is that just talk?

You can believe in an ideal and not follow your beliefs all the time. Nopony's perfect.

Edited 2014-09-27 18:58 (UTC)

The magnitude of my crimes will echo throughout Equestrian history. Hell, I pushed Fluttershy into a pond once!

Well I forgave Fluttershy once after she dumped an entire cart full of garbage on my head.

That doesn't mean I have to be smiles and sunshine 24/7. Especially when the ponies closest to me get hurt.

Edited 2014-10-04 00:17 (UTC)

Fluttershy. Pond. Crimes. Magnitude. History. Seriously. The whole slushball incident wasn't half as reviled as that, and that was SLUSHBALLS.

First Licorice [Visual, postdated to after the event]

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