Pokey Minch (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ceasetoexist) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
mylittlejamjar2015-02-06 12:39 am
ceasetoexist) wrote in mylittlejamjar2015-02-06 12:39 am
Ninth Scale - Audio
You know even after being here like, half a year, I'm always surprised by the dumb crap you horses keep thinking up. I mean, I guess Valentine's Day isn't exactly a tradition you idiots have on your own, but it's still a dumb idea. But you know what?
I guess what it's meant to represent isn't, much as some people here think it's something to be scared of. And I guess it's scary. I mean, it is I guess, if you're a weeny. Or just...have never had it or...
Know what? Love is super important. Here's why. Stick with me if you idiots think you can, cause here's a good reason.
I'm a pretty mean guy. I don't really hide it. And I do pretty mean things. But if you met me before the last place I was you'd see how nasty I really could be. I don't mean like throwing pies in each others faces or tripping one another or whatever you all think are war crimes. I did stuff that'd blow your little pony minds. And I was pretty sure I'd always be that way.
But then, the last place I was? And yeah, this is cliche, I met someone. A girl.
It started off pretty great, too. I mean first time I met her she put a weapon to my head because I was screwing around in her back yard making a map of the town we were in, so it was pretty romantic from the start. And you know, I guess people wouldn't think she had the best temperament: she was loud, and bossy, and sarcastic and rude.
She was a lot of the things I was. But underneath that? She also had a decency to her. She was brave where I was a coward, and and patient where I rushed at crap, and even though a lot of people wouldn't see it? She could be kind, when she wanted to be, when I was just a cruel jerk. I related to her because of the immediate parts of myself I saw in her but, you know. I came to care about her because of the better parts of her, and how she treated to me.
Like I said, I'm not a nice guy. No one had really been nice to me before, aside from my brother. ...And my neighbor, though I screwed him over in the end. He was my friend; I was never really his. But anyway? The fact that she showed me kindness, that she actually wanted to be my friend, include me in things...that was the first time anyone ever had. I dunno. I think at first I just wanted to impress her, but as time went on I guess I realized...
She taught me how to care, even if she didn't know she was. And because of that I actually had friends for once. Had a home. And because I could see myself in her but also something better than me, I wanted to be better than I was too. If I had never met her, who knows. Maybe my luck would've been crappy like it always was and I'd never try and change. Your luck would be crappy too.
See. I want to improve because of the people I know back there, and because of her. Because I love them. I love her.
And the reason I'm telling you this, something none of you losers deserve to hear in a hundred years, is because the fact that I love her and want to be better? Is the only reason I haven't decided to slit your collective throats and push your dumb, metaphorical bodies in front of a freight train by trying to find someone who could help me get back to them for the cost of betraying you. And I'd do it to. Because I don't care about you. But I care about her. And because I care about her, I can't. I can't think about selling you out or, if there were no takers on that, just rampaging about and ruining you idiots day on a daily basis.
That and if history is any indicator? I'm going to end up spilling this crap anyway when Valentine's actually gets here. I hate these places for that.
So if you're a complete moron who thinks love and relationships are really that fragile, consider this. It's because it isn't that you have one less psycho to deal with screwing you here.
You're welcome.
[Private to Giegue]
Hey boss.
Let's talk.
[Because he can't imagine a rant like this wouldn't attract Giegue's attention. Or that he'd have to defend himself over it.
Might as well jump right at the lion and get it over with.]
I guess what it's meant to represent isn't, much as some people here think it's something to be scared of. And I guess it's scary. I mean, it is I guess, if you're a weeny. Or just...have never had it or...
Know what? Love is super important. Here's why. Stick with me if you idiots think you can, cause here's a good reason.
I'm a pretty mean guy. I don't really hide it. And I do pretty mean things. But if you met me before the last place I was you'd see how nasty I really could be. I don't mean like throwing pies in each others faces or tripping one another or whatever you all think are war crimes. I did stuff that'd blow your little pony minds. And I was pretty sure I'd always be that way.
But then, the last place I was? And yeah, this is cliche, I met someone. A girl.
It started off pretty great, too. I mean first time I met her she put a weapon to my head because I was screwing around in her back yard making a map of the town we were in, so it was pretty romantic from the start. And you know, I guess people wouldn't think she had the best temperament: she was loud, and bossy, and sarcastic and rude.
She was a lot of the things I was. But underneath that? She also had a decency to her. She was brave where I was a coward, and and patient where I rushed at crap, and even though a lot of people wouldn't see it? She could be kind, when she wanted to be, when I was just a cruel jerk. I related to her because of the immediate parts of myself I saw in her but, you know. I came to care about her because of the better parts of her, and how she treated to me.
Like I said, I'm not a nice guy. No one had really been nice to me before, aside from my brother. ...And my neighbor, though I screwed him over in the end. He was my friend; I was never really his. But anyway? The fact that she showed me kindness, that she actually wanted to be my friend, include me in things...that was the first time anyone ever had. I dunno. I think at first I just wanted to impress her, but as time went on I guess I realized...
She taught me how to care, even if she didn't know she was. And because of that I actually had friends for once. Had a home. And because I could see myself in her but also something better than me, I wanted to be better than I was too. If I had never met her, who knows. Maybe my luck would've been crappy like it always was and I'd never try and change. Your luck would be crappy too.
See. I want to improve because of the people I know back there, and because of her. Because I love them. I love her.
And the reason I'm telling you this, something none of you losers deserve to hear in a hundred years, is because the fact that I love her and want to be better? Is the only reason I haven't decided to slit your collective throats and push your dumb, metaphorical bodies in front of a freight train by trying to find someone who could help me get back to them for the cost of betraying you. And I'd do it to. Because I don't care about you. But I care about her. And because I care about her, I can't. I can't think about selling you out or, if there were no takers on that, just rampaging about and ruining you idiots day on a daily basis.
That and if history is any indicator? I'm going to end up spilling this crap anyway when Valentine's actually gets here. I hate these places for that.
So if you're a complete moron who thinks love and relationships are really that fragile, consider this. It's because it isn't that you have one less psycho to deal with screwing you here.
You're welcome.
[Private to Giegue]
Hey boss.
Let's talk.
[Because he can't imagine a rant like this wouldn't attract Giegue's attention. Or that he'd have to defend himself over it.
Might as well jump right at the lion and get it over with.]
no subject
You think I'd really be dumb enough to lie to you?
no subject
no subject
Even if I wasn't working with you I wouldn't be dumb enough to try and work something against you.
no subject
[His red eyes grows wider and darkens.]
Because then, you will have given me a reason to take back everything I've invested in you. With interest.
no subject
You can count on me.
[To betray you.]
no subject
[His voice is low and a kind of intensity follows it. Though Giegue's naturally a humorless entity, this one seemed moreso.]
I would like you to be happy, Pokey. But whether that's what you want, you'll have to prove that to me.
1/2 [Visual/Private]
You don't know how angry it makes him to hear that. You didn't know them. You couldn't have known them, what makes you think you get to disrespect them?
It isn't even the pointing out of the loss of what had been his, of the fleeting happiness he'd managed to have, if only for a few, hard years. It's the disrespect, even if just in that instant, so carelessly thrown out that Pokey can't stand. It should be such a little thing; Giegue himself probably considered it one of the less important parts of his threat, Pokey was pretty sure. But to him it was the harshest.
And so, before he can catch himself.]
Shut up.
no subject
[His voice is acidic, vitriolic, and he's having to keep it up to try and hide any possible panic that might have been coming. To hope that he can keep Giegue thinking that he's just angry and annoyed at being challenged so repeatedly, not because Giegue hit a nerve.]
I mean, if you don't want my help just say so. But I'm getting tired of having to prove I'm loyal when I proved it when I decided not to crush you to death the first moment I saw you here.
Cut it out with the happiness guilt crap, you sound like my dad.
no subject
Even Pokey was becoming difficult to predict. He had little idea of how to handle it, but needless to say, it's probably prudent to back down here. Giegue relaxes and gives a sigh.]
Fine. I doubt you'd openly defy me anyhow no matter how much you've changed. That's enough for today, then.