mylittlejamjar | Eleven Cupcakes: Party Planning

Hey guys!

So, I just wanted to tell you all about this REALLY GREAT idea I had! It's called the Special Somepony Summit! You all know about Hearts and Hooves Day, right? It's pretty much like Valentine's Day, except here and for ponies! And now for YOU!

Anyway, the Special Somepony Summit is gonna be like the Sisterhooves Social, only for couples! You show up and you're on a team, and you play games with other teams to win a trophy! And don't worry, you can just show up with a friend if you're single! I would TOTALLY do it with one of my friends, but I'm gonna be judging since I set it all up!

Ooooh, ooooh, also! We're gonna try to debut some new love-flavored treats for the holidays! Me and my intern Stacy -

[A changeling leans in from offscreen.] Actually...I kinda changed my mind about the name. I wanna be Black Thunder now!

Oh! Well, me and Black Thunder have been experimenting, and we're TOTALLY close to getting the right taste down! I mean, I guess it's not really a taste taste...but it's close, right?

Oh, totally! Hey...do you think Black Thunder's really me?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Bertie's side-eying Gwen severely now. She's with another girl? And she's announcing it on a very public scroll. He bites down on the impulse to shut her down, trying to remind himself that it isn't illegal, that it shouldn't matter what others think, and that there's nothing wrong with it. Not really. Well, there is, but he's trying to ignore that. Although... well, the Bible has something to say about men lying with other men, but women don't come up.]

Ah, right. That, um... well. It's rather ditto for self.

[He glances nervously side-to-side, blushing a bit. That's about as far as he's willing to go at the moment in mentioning Jeeves, though.]

Isn't that a Pokemon?

...never mind.

[POKEMON AREN'T REAL, GWENIE. At least not in this world.]

Heeeey, cheer up, I'm sure they have some singles-related events going around Ponyville that you could appropriate for your own needs.

[Good to know she's not in the boat alone, at least.

Also, Bibles don't exist in her world.]

That said, I'm not sure how many of the girls here are also queer, but it'd be nice to have someone to talk to about being left alone regardless.

Edited 2014-02-24 00:27 (UTC)

I seem to have encountered nothing but queer girls here, if you're in the market for someone to chat with. [Bertie replies with a light huff. The only exception might be Fluttershy.]

I think I'll just be relegating myself to a jolly day in with a book, in any case.

[He has work to do to help Pollo, after all!]

[And that merits a bit of a giggle.]

And what's a boy like you know about queer ladies?

I happen to know a lot about a lot of ladies, actually. I've been engaged dozens of times. [Wait, that's not something to be proud of.] Er... I mean you get to know a thing or two about the fairer sex when they're off chasing you, what?

[Even considering the fact that not all queer girls solely date other ladies, that's...highly unlikely. And what.]

Please tell me you're exaggerating with those 'dozens'.

[Still...maybe she ought to dig a bit deeper.]

And uh, no offense, but somehow I doubt the veracity of what you just said.

What? I'm being entirely honest! Well, I mean there's got to be at least a dozen times. [He starts to tick them off.] I've gotten engaged to Madeline three or four times, Florence twice, Stiffy once, Honoria twice- [Bertie shudders a bit because Honoria.] - Bobbie, Pauline, Cynthia, and then Pinkie Pie all the once.

[This is obviously proving his point.]

Edited 2014-02-27 03:28 (UTC)

I hate to break it to you, but most people consider having that many engagements broken off a major event in their lives.

[Seriously, WHY YOU TELLING HER THIS LIKE IT IS BREAKFAST OR SMOETHING.]

My brother's only been engaged once, and I'm pretty sure he still isn't over breaking it off.

I never broke them off. That wouldn't be preux. [It is breakfast discussion, Gwen. The latest engagement usually had been with Jeeves.]

And engagements aren't really anything that important. I mean, just so long as no business results.

So, what, you just sit around, twiddling your thumbs, hoping they'll dump you?

[Or they dumped him without him even hoping. BECAUSE SHE CAN BELIEVE THAT.]

I know this sounds kind of obvious, but most people don't get engaged unless they actually plan to marry the person they get engaged to. If you didn't want to marry any of them in the first place, you really should've made that clear.

Trust me, people appreciate the honesty.

Of course, not. Jeeves and I had to figure out how to get them back with one of my chums or off to a more suitable chappie.

[Really, Gwen. You're making it sound like he had any choice in the matter.]

And it's... well, it's rather part of the Code, you know? I can't just give a girl the bum's rush if she comes to me with arms wide and heart hoping. I've, er... been reconsidering that part of the Code since coming here, though.

[A lot.]

[She sighs rather heavily, and it's easy, dear Bertie, to see she's disappointed with you.]

People make mistakes sometimes, Bertie. It doesn't matter if they really like you or not. You don't owe anyone anything when it comes to whether or not they want a relationship with you, and you don't have to accept someone else's proposal if you don't want to marry them.

[He's been beaten over the head with this more than once, so he merely cringes.] I know. I-I've got to go... iron the oven! [Because he really doesn't want to get lectured on this right now.] Pip pip!

[He rolls up the scroll, but he'll be drawn in later for those awkward conversations that happened... and then want to go hide forever and wish he'd never reopened the scroll.]

Eleven Cupcakes: Party Planning

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