We Went To the Land Of the Ice and Snow

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[The scroll flickers on to show nothing but white. Distantly, beneath a blowing wind, the sounds of whirling propellers and hard work press faintly through. Then crunching -- the unmistakable sound of hooves compressing snow.]

Aww, crap.

[The viewpoint jerks up to reveal the Overlord, snow spotting his coat but not his fiery mane, as he stands in the midst of a swirling blizzard. In the distance, barely visible, his minion horde marches off the airship he'd long ago stolen for Talk Like A Pirate Day and... neglected to return.]

Who the hell designs a magic scroll that's so easy to accidentally turn on?

Hmph. Looks like the cat's out of the bag. [Smirking, the Overlord sweeps a hoof out as he turns the scroll to reveal great mounds of snow lumping up across an otherwise featureless plain. Closer inspection shows that these lumps are in fact ruins, crumbled buildings in various states of decay.]

Stalliongrad. The site of an ancient battle between ponies and windigos, and if Princess Celestia's dreams are anything to go on, the Frozen Fire of Friendship just might be here somewhere. Once I find it, I'll have all the power of ice and snow that the windigos have... and then Equestria will either be mine, or a frozen hell of ponies in ice blocks, trapped and wishing their Princesses had surrendered instead of condemning them! Hyaaa ha ha ha ha!

[Zetta flicks his tail at the scroll as he turns to match towards the ruins, shutting it off.]

Comments

[holyfight]

Eh heh, see?

[Of course, she talks a good game now, but that's after years of insecurity because she's primarily a healer and not an offensive fighter]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

I'm guessing it's a fanservice-heavy healing, huh? [The Overlord is generally pretty genre savvy, but in this case his deductions have failed him.]

[holyfight]

Wait, what's that supposed to mean?

[If a pony could pout, man, that's what she's doing.

They can pout, right?]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

That just seems like it would be part of your thing. You know... short skirts flaring up with the magical energy. Intimate healing, if you catch my drift...

[holyfight]

My skirt doesn't flare up at all! It's just a dome!

[90% of her boobs being bare in her latest outfit notwithstanding]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[He's unable to comment on that, though! ...damn, he misses boobs. Not that pony forms didn't have a lot to appreciate, but those sure weren't on the list.]

Well, why not? It ought to.

[holyfight]

Why would it? It's just a healing dome, it's not like it'd blow my skirt up!

[unless she's sliding down drain pipes or jumping around and not paying any attention to it. Like usual.]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

The swirling winds of healing power or something. You know, it's dramatic. Whenever someone is using a large amount of power, their hair and clothing flap in the wind even if there isn't any wind, right?

[holyfight]

Well, sometimes my hair blows back if it's a really hectic battle, but not usually!

[Wait, hold on, pause - GASP]

You're one of those perverts that Tatsuki-chan always warned me about, aren't you?! The kind that sits under the stairs and tries to take cell phone pictures up girls' skirts!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

I have more class than that! Don't tell me that you think every guy who likes to look at hot girls is a pervert!

[holyfight]

Only when your first response to being told I'm a healer is to wonder if it blows my skirt up!

[Right? What do you even DO when you find a guy who's talking about your skirt? Tatsuki never told her that part!]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

We're big on fanservice in the Netherworld! I mean, we ARE demons, we're not exactly innocent and pure down there.

[holyfight]

[Wait... what?]

So... do... all the healers in your world have to do fanservice, too?

[WHAT ABOUT THAT ONE WEIRD GUY BACK HOME IN 4TH DIVISION?! IN A THONG???]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Eh, it's not a perfect system. But I'm working on it, damn it!

[Their meanings have completely crossed, because 'healer' is a female sprite in Makai Kingdom, but also a fairly chaste one.]