mylittlejamjar | Prelude in C Minor

[There's a minotaur all up in your collective grills, Equestria. One that has his face mostly obscured by a trenchcoat and fedora, both in a dusty light brown.]

Alright. Clearly, I musta fallen asleep in front of one of Peacock's shows or something. Because this is one hell of a dream.

[His voice is smooth, rich, and deep, almost as if he's a natural born singer.]

... well, either that, or some Skullgirl made the world's worst wish. Seriously, why's this place gotta be so bright...

Moping aside, might as well introduce myself. The name's Ben Birdland, but you can call me Big Band. It's what I'm used to.

Now, anybody wanna give me directions to the nearest bar? Because if I'm gonna wait this thing out, I'm gonna wait it out with some gin.

[If anybody so chooses, they can find the hulk of a bull stomping (lightly) around the Town Square, trying to get his bearings. Seems like there's a similarly massive saxophone strapped to his back, and he's having no trouble carrying it around.]

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[Speaking of bright, here's a positively pastel-colored pony. ...With what can only be described as a fancy pirate hat.]

My, first time I've seen an arrival turned into a minotaur. Congratulations, you've broken new ground.

Well, Cap'n, I'll be more than honored to take that distinction. [What is this place.]

[Welcome to Equestria. Leave your sense at the border.]

I suppose it was a matter of time, with the amount of new arrivals this place gets. In any case, welcome to Equestria. I trust you have already been pointed in the direction of the Decanter?

Mmhm. Few times, now. Friendly buncha folk around here, huh?

Mostly. There are a few unsavory characters, but this is a small town; there is little cause for aloofness, aside from a few... special occasions.

"Unsavory characters". Something tells me I'll be uniquely equipped to deal with 'em if the need arises. [Punctuated with a cracking of his knuckles.]

You won't be alone. A great deal of newcomers here fancy themselves fighters or heroes of some sort. Ponyville is starting to earn a reputation as the worst place to commit a crime.

I'm not a hero, miss. Just a firm believer in the spirit of the law and the power of a good punch.

Good to hear I'm probably not the only one.

You will get along just fine with everypony, in that case.

[However, Celestia makes a mental note to not discuss her usual dealings with this minotaur. Especially the recent ones.]

"Everypony". Is that just something that everypony-- er, everybody unconsciously says? Or did I miss some sign explaining the lingo on the way here?

I could not say for certain, as I grew up with the term, but from what I have noticed it is an unconscious switch for most who arrive here to go from "anyone" to "anypony".

The effect may be reduced with non-pony species, however.

Yeah, it... doesn't flow off the tongue all that well for me, but I can't help it.

Weird damn place. Least it's not just me going crazy.

Life's not fun if it isn't a little crazy.

You ain't wrong there. Every good piece needs some crazy improv.

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