mylittlejamjar | Prelude in C Minor

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Prelude in C Minor - [Visual/Action]

[There's a minotaur all up in your collective grills, Equestria. One that has his face mostly obscured by a trenchcoat and fedora, both in a dusty light brown.]

Alright. Clearly, I musta fallen asleep in front of one of Peacock's shows or something. Because this is one hell of a dream.

[His voice is smooth, rich, and deep, almost as if he's a natural born singer.]

... well, either that, or some Skullgirl made the world's worst wish. Seriously, why's this place gotta be so bright...

Moping aside, might as well introduce myself. The name's Ben Birdland, but you can call me Big Band. It's what I'm used to.

Now, anybody wanna give me directions to the nearest bar? Because if I'm gonna wait this thing out, I'm gonna wait it out with some gin.

[If anybody so chooses, they can find the hulk of a bull stomping (lightly) around the Town Square, trying to get his bearings. Seems like there's a similarly massive saxophone strapped to his back, and he's having no trouble carrying it around.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Repetition in a minor key, huh? Ain't that the story of my life.

Heh. Used to be I was the one doing the jailin', not being the jailed. But I'll consider it however's best for me right now.

Walkin' the beat, huh? I've been there, back where I'm from. As it stands I'm one of the bouncers at the place I just directed ya to.

But, yeah. I mean, what else can y'call a place y'end up for no good reason and can't get out of? Th'lot of us are tryin' to figure out the typical Great Escape, but it's the long game.

Used to, long while ago. Nowadays I'm a little more... specialized. Or, uh. Was. Ain't no Skull Hearts in... Equestria, right?

"Skull Hearts"? I'm figurin' that's a thing, not a person, so... gotta say no, as far as I know.

Like I said, different problems, not really worth fussing over.

All the better if that damn thing never showed its ugly face around here. Does nothing but cause trouble whenever it pops up.

One less theory for me to worry about. Thought for a second this might have been the Canopy Kingdom's stupidest wish.

I dunno, wishes get pretty dumb around here.

[She's at least heard about Kyouko turning into a bear and the long-passed incident of Homura bodyjacking Dante.

Sheesh, wishing to be Dante. THERE'S a stupid wish.]

I can only imagine.

[It takes some time, but the conversation helped. He's ended up in front of the Decanter, and he spins the scroll around to show it.] Should I be expecting you inside, or were you just a friendly guiding hoof this time around?

You tell me, chief.

[Unlike the other ponies, this one almost comes up two thirds to eye level with Ben! She happened to be dwelling around the other side of the building.]

Slow nights, means I don't need to keep much of an eye open for fillies tryin' to sneak in during happy hour. Then again, if you're workin' those pipes, we might get another crowd like Harv got.

[...You don't want the fanfillies, Ben. Trust us.]

I spoke to Mr. Finevoice on the way over here. Pleasant fellow. [Dang, you're... big. Well, relatively. Pretty clear why you're the bouncer here, Flare.]

But, uh, somethin' tells me I'm probably not gonna be steppin' on his hooves for a chance at that mic. I've got my other set of pipes right here with me. [He motions backwards towards the massive saxophone strapped to his back.]

Nothin' sayin' you two couldn't duet. [If you know what she means]

Jazz player, then?

[She might be playing coy. Maybe. It's not like he had an obvious nickname, or anything.]

[Shut up Flare, he just got here!]

Heh. If you think this is obvious, you shoulda seen my other set of pipes. Didn't come around with me, though.

Oh? Somethin' tells me you aren't talkin' about an organ.

[... heh. That's funny for a bunch of reasons.]

You ain't wrong. Ain't right, either, but ain't wrong. Used to have to get around in a two-and-a-half-ton mechanized iron lung. Wasn't pretty.

[He looks down at himself, his chest, his arms...] This? This is practically an upgrade in all respects.

[She meant like a pipe organ, not that. Jesus christ.]

Cripes. Usually when I say it brings folks that're broken here, I meant more emotionally.

[Now she's gonna feel awful for him when everything's over, too. On top of her relationship woes.]

Everybody's got their problems, Flare. I consider myself lucky that I came out the way I did.

But hey. Land of second chances, right?

...True enough.

[It was just humbling, is all. Especially with the thoughts she's had in mind recently.]

So, uh. Anyone tell you about that repetition in minor on the way here?

Nah, nothing specific. Just little hints that this candy-coated burg isn't exactly what it seems to be.

You got something you want to share?

Mn. Yes and no. S'gonna come out eventually anyway, since it's the hotbutton topic. Apparently the one keepin' us here is some twisted, corrupt mockery of life and death that's usin' us as one giant social experiment before she devours this universe.

Our best bet on actually stoppin' her is probably friendship, as dumb as it sounds. S'the one thing she doesn't comprehend.

So, uh.

[... um. Well. Okay. So that's a thing. Apparently, Ben's not all that fazed about this news.]

Ain't all that worse than your average Skullgirl... though those are usually defeated more through the liberal application of high-velocity impacts rather than... friendship.

And I'll let you know now, I'm pretty good at the former. [He's... okay at the latter. For now.]

Yeah, that's one thing we ain't got a shortage on, is muscle.

[Flare shakes her head. Too much of it, she'd argue. But that was a rant for another time, and certainly not to a new arrival.]

Lackin' in harmony, though. Got a whole bunch of players all with their own idea on what song t'play.

[If nothing else, she figures someone like Big Band can parse the musical analogies she's been thinking in, lately.]

Too many soloists, not enough bandleaders. I hear ya. [Music puns. He has met his people.]

As strong as everybody might be, all that improvisin' eventually runs all over itself and just makes a big damn mess of everything, right?

We're on mess number... [She holds up a hoof, counting to herself despite not having actual... y'know... fingers to do it with.] Four, now, I think?

First one was entirely my fault, I admit. Tried to smoke out a suspect in a really bad way, got the whole town up in arms just before one of the Pale Pony's little "tests". Second was an international incident caused by someone stealin' a priceless artifact from griffon lands. Third and fourth...

[Flare sighs.]

Let's just say that th'government makes its share of mistakes and leave it at that. T'go into detail would just be another big mess.

[Flare sighs and leans against the wall of the Decanter.]

So, yeah. At the moment we're just noise.

[Damn. There really is a seedy underbelly to this place. Just like New Meridian. A little like home. If he's smiling, it's really faintly.]

First off... you don't have fingers. Is that just reflex? [Because seriously, that's weird.]

Anyway. I'm not expectin' the whole overture right now, Flare. If I need more detail, I'll ask. Probably over gin... or cider... or whatever it is you guys've got here. But just know that wrangling noise?

Yeah, that was my specialty back home.

I had no idea how damn useful fingers were until I got a set, let me just say. Hooves are easier to work than most humans think, but nothin' quite like actually bein' able to write halfway competently.

[Despite herself, that reassurance brings a smile to her face.]

Cider's the town specialty, what with the apple farms right on the outskirts. Most other stuff's gotta be imported, or is mixed drinks.

Afraid I can't exactly drink on the job, but if y'tell Minty inside that you're here on my blessin' she'll know it's safe t'bring down the top-shelf stuff. Y'know, the "I just ended up in a pastel pony world and nothin' makes sense" special.

... okay, that one, you're gonna need to elaborate on. When did you manage to get fingers?

And besides, you can't be working all the time. Maybe I can catch you off the job.

[... he can't help himself, he has to ask.] And uh... your bartender, is her last name "Fresh"?

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