I used to wonder what friendship could be... [Visual, open.]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[So yeah. There's a familiar unicorn popping up on the scrolls, except, uh, he's not a unicorn any more. There's a couple of wings poking out from behind that massive fire mane.]

...As my first decree as Overlord of Equestria, apparently, I hereby, uh, politely request you all go light on the Princess jokes.

[...maybe he actually totally legitimately earned those wings, if he's asking like that.]

Comments

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Trust me, I can prove I'm still all-stallion. I'm pretty sure you don't want to encourage me to stop asking nicely and start flashing.

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

You can still be a pretty princess, regardless of gender.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

It's a gendered title, damn it!

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

That hasn't stopped ponies before. Why should it stop you?

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

When has it not stopped them before? I don't see you being a king!

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

[In response, Celestia produces what looks to be a medal and shows it to the scroll.]

[It reads "PRESENTED TO THE SOVERIGN OF LEEREX IV, GOD-KING CELESTIA, FOR PREVENTING CIVIL WAR AND SAVING THE KINGDOM FROM FINANCIAL RUIN"]

It was only for a short time, but I did hold the title of King.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Zetta squints at the medal through the scrolls, a frown on his face.]

No. No, that's clearly the title of God-King.

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

They're similar enough to prove my point.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

No, and I'll tell you why: because "Goddess-Queen" is a completely ridiculous and unworkable title!

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

Of course it is; that title went to my helmsman.

Or maybe my treasurer. That culture handed out titles like candy.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

What'd they do to deserve that kind of terrible title? Punishment in your crew was harsh!

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

It was a great honor to be bestowed that title.

[Or so they said. Whether it was true or not is subjective.]

At least it's better than "Demigoddess-Empress-President" that was serving as regent when we got there.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

...When I get off of this planet, I'm finding this world and cracking it into bite-sized chunks, and I don't care how good a deed that is.

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

But the people there are so cute aside from the tentacle faces, at least. It would be a shame for them to go.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

To stop the spread of titles that bad, any sacrifice is worth it! And by any, I mean theirs. Their sacrifice.

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

Just be careful, else they'll bestow a title upon you, as well.

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

They can't bestow a title on me FROM ORBIT! [Zetta practically hops in place in his wroth.]

[Visual]

[pirateponyprincess]

They couldn't at first, but I did leave some comm equipment there.

[Maybe she actually did, maybe she didn't, but right now she's enjoying getting a rise out of Zetta.]

[Visual]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Then I'll ignore incoming hails! I'm totally allowed to do that!