"...A castle. I need an Overlord's castle!" [video]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[The video feed of the scroll displays... a castle. An ancient, crumbling castle surrounded by forest, yet with enough stability left that much of it still stands tall and proud.]

Okay, two questions. First, why is there a sweet if poorly-maintained castle in the middle of this forest, and second, mine now! Hyaaa ha ha ha ha!

Comments

[sailorlaughter]

Kinda, but you can't be TOTALLY happy, or you wouldn't want a war and stuff! Those aren't very fun, y'know.

[badassfreakingoverlord]

They are to me. I'm a demon. War and violence are as natural to us as manes and tails are to ponies.

[sailorlaughter]

Really?

Wow, you must get some REAL nasty bedhead in the mornings!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Does this gorgeous mane look like it gets mussed easily?

[Zetta rears back and tosses his head side-to-side, making the sheet of flames that is his mane ripple and spit out more fire bats.]

[sailorlaughter]

It looks kinda like you'd light your pillow on fire...

[badassfreakingoverlord]

And YOU look like you'd get your pillow stuck, cotton-candy-head. It's more awesome than seriously flammable.

[sailorlaughter]

Nah, that only happens sometimes! Hardly EVER now that Rarity got me this cool new shampoo! It smells like daisies~!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Zetta frowns at her thoughtfully, tapping a hoof against the ground.]

I'm not sure if you're intolerable or kind of hot.

[sailorlaughter]

It does sometimes get pretty warm in here when all the ovens are running!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

No, the sexy kind of hot.

[Like he didn't see THAT misunderstanding coming a mile away.]

[sailorlaughter]

[Blink. Blink. Blink.]

Huh. I don't think anypony's ever said that to me before. [She should ask her other her about it, maybe she's had a special somepony. Not that Pinkie really thinks she wants to be special someponies with Zetta, she doesn't think.]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

I'm not surprised. That's something I've noticed. I don't know if you ponies are just way too big on 'feelings' instead of noticing hotness, or if you're just unclear on the concept, but you lady ponies clearly aren't used to somepony saying you're hot.

Kind of a shame, actually.

[sailorlaughter]

I dunno, I think it all turns out okay! I mean, there's still lots of baby ponies, right?

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Yeah, but the point I was making isn't the results, it's the enjoyable process.

[sailorlaughter]

[.....Pinkie has this vague feeling like she should go get her Daddy Pie or something. Too bad he's all the way at the rock farm.]

Iiiiiii guess so?

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Well, Pinkie at least has a little sanity left, if she has that sort of impulse still lingering deep inside her skull.]

Hyaaa ha ha ha ha! I'm looking forward to the transformation you ponies will undergo when this world becomes a Netherworld. You'll discover the joys of evil and debauchery!

[sailorlaughter]

[Congratulations, Zetta, you have just out-weirded Pinkie Pie.]

...heeeeeeey, I think I hear Mr. Cake calling! Gotta go - talk to you later, 'kay! [She probably will, too, if he calls. After all, she is friends with EVERYPONY in Ponyville.]