It can't be....

[The scroll's image starts off black with only the trembling mare's voice. A little unicorn magic flips the scroll over. The sky was breaking into day but the tears in Saori's eyes are still visble. She trembles as she takes the deep breath to calm her herself. Her eyes don't look into the scroll as she speaks.]

I...managed to return from Exsilium with bittersweet news. The United Earth is no more, so I suppose it's mission accomplished. The bad news is we...can't go back. Time and world travel technology there is now permanently decommissioned according to the AI.

[She hangs her head and tears well up as her voice cracks.]

Margulis, please tell me you're still around. I'm sorry. I failed you.

[Just a lazy Sunday in House Derp. And Gentarou poses a question to Ankh.]

Hey, Ankh? Why do people call you a rainbow assbird anyhow?

[Anything Ankh has to say in a furious manner is interrupted by rainbow explosions. And in the silence, Gentarou states,] I'm pretty sure I exploded him.

Whoof... It's taking longer than expected, but my shop's coming along nicely! There's still work to be done, but when it's really done, I can start selling many of the Apple Family's stuff here and maybe a few other things, too!

If there's something you want, let me know!

[Locked to Cure Item holders, so surprise her if she doesn't know it.]

Oh, before I forget, I've added a spot upstairs so we can hang out. L-like a base or something! We're all Cures so, we need to stick together one way or another... Like a team.

I-if you want to visit now, I wouldn't mind it at all!

[With a harsh look on his face, Ramza has his scroll open. Was this a phone, like he'd heard of before?

...No matter. All he could do is shake his head, as he spoke quickly, though easily masking his fear and worry.]
I've need to return to Lady Cosmos, as soon as possible. This country - where is it compared to her shrine? [He pauses, before speaking up again, slightly levitating a crystal nearby into his pouch.] If it is a long trip, I'll set out as soon as possible. This land - 'tis different to my home. I've seen no beast like this before - what exactly are they?
[...A body like this - perhaps he could be a Chocobo-like steed? The thought would make him chuckle, if he wasn't such a serious young boy. Shuffling a little, seeming like he'd say something else, the video feed soon turned off.

If you find him around town, though, you'll find a unicorn with his horn slightly glowing - and a soft song playing from... his pouch? He's got a small crystal in it, but. He seems to be more skipping then walking, even with his serious look.]

I'm glad everything got settled, but I'm sorry that I didn't help - I was trying to, but Lyra and I got kinda sidetracked with all the foods and such at Cloudsdale that we... kinda... forgot. Sorry! But, I'll do better next time! I promise!

On a good note, in a few weeks, it's Winter Wrap-Up! I enjoy that... even if I mess up every year. But, I'll do better this year, too!

...is there anything that's happened that's been interesting to you?

[Locked to OU!Rainbow Dash]

Um... you still upset about what happened last month?

Well, THAT was the worst date ever.

[Zetta scowls at the scroll from beneath a top hat, looking slightly angry and mostly... glum, not that he would ever admit it.]

Incidentally, the non-Dame Rarity just vanished in a puff of rainbow. No, I wasn't responsible. Figured I'd better tell you all before you showed up at the castle with torches and pitchforks. Save it for the stuff I actually DO.

*Alastor is in his castle, but for once, there's more light than his floating orbs of electricity. He's holding a mug of some sort of hot brown liquid, with a tin labelled Pheromone Coffee sitting on a floating cloud table next to him. Off to the side a fire crackles merrily under a metal grill with a pot of water on it and...wait, is that a pile of film burning? It sure looks like it.*

A little suggestion: don't watch anything you find in the dungeon without asking around a bit first. Some of the stuff in there is so awful it might give you brain damage.

*He takes a sip from his mug, then looks back at the scroll.*

Speaking of asking about things in the dungeons, does anyone know what Pheromone Coffee is?

(No, he is not actually drinking the coffee. Not that there's any way of telling just by looking.)

[Sanaki's handwriting is immaculate and elegant. She clearly has had many, many lessons.]

People of Equestria, answer me this.

What have you learned here?

I speak of both the practical knowledge of skills one picks up, the making of objects not found in one's home, as well as the personal changes that affect anyone who lives and breathes for a time.

What do you bring home from you, if you go without chance to bring anything material?

[Signed with a flourish:] Sanaki, Empress of Begnion

[When the scroll starts up, it shows a very irate-looking purple mare. She's in some sort of crystal room.]

A week and a half. A week and a bloody half! That's how long it took me to get my scroll back. D'you know how long a week and a half is when you're apparently living in Bananaville, population bureaucrats who want you to fill out every flipping form they've got on the moon?

That's right: the moon. Carl when I get my hooves on you, mister, I swear to god I'm going to douse your mane, take that bleeding 'status screen' of yours, and shove it somewhere you really won't like. Who actually sends someone to the moon? You're insane, and now I can't get back because I haven't got the proper papers for a cargo transport ship.

Andrew. Doctor. Get me down from here!

Okay, so I've gotten deep into the dungeon. Haven't seen anything yet.

*Munch munch*

All I found was this treasure box full of cookies and there's so many! I can't believe there was a treasure chest full of them.

*munch munch*

So in any case, I haven't seen any monsters yet, it's like it's taking a day off or something. It's just really dark and deep.

*munch munch*

Wow how many cookies are IN this chest anyhow?

*munch munch*

[A brightly colored pegasus appears on the scroll, various birds perched on his head or flitting around in the background. He seems to be outside.]

If I'm going to stay here, I need a place to live. It's been fun visiting everyone and eating all your food, but it's time I have my own hut again. I found some branches in the forest near town -- not the deep forest; can someone tell me which part of the forest to stay out of? I think it's important that I stay out of any parts of the forest where monsters live. I wouldn't want to put the monsters to any inconvenience in chasing me.

[He seems to realize he's off track and engages conversational course correction.] I need some straw for the roof, though, and I wouldn't mind a nicer bed than the ground. Does anyone know where to get those kinds of things? And a stove, I'm sure I'll need a stove first thing.

Hey, guys, two big favors here: Where can I get someone who can shrink stuff and where can I find some real meat?

I got something from that auction from my world - a pair of old shoes I used once - and they're just a tad too big for me. Way too big. Like 'em smaller so I can run in them. And maybe grind of what I can find.

As for the meat? Seriously, I know you guys are horses, but snacking on gems has just no taste! And what you guys do for chili dogs is an outrage! CARROT chili dogs! If there's any crunch to my 'dog, I'd want it to be from the onions!

Hiiiiiiiiii, everypony~! I want you to meet my newest friend!

[Pinkie turns the scroll and...oh lord. That is a statue pony. And Pinkie did her best, but this statue pony is still pretty clearly made out of pieces of several other statue ponies. It's even got a horn and wings - not to mention the pink plastic tiara on its head.]

This is Princess Pumice! She's been pretty quiet so far, but I've been taking her to meet everypony! Everypony in the bakery, anyway, she's pretty heavy! And I gave her a Welcome Cupcake, see? [It's just sitting on a little table in front of the statue. Pinkie bounces over, throwing her foreleg around Princess Pumice's shoulders.]

These are all my newpony friends, Princess Pumice! Say hi!

-es it even function?

[Cue the scroll cutting in abruptly to an..upside down red pony with a goatee and a rather pink magenta colored shirt. He looks a little tired, and slightly disheveled.]

Is...is this working? Is it on? I'm going to pretend it is. It's hard enough figuring out how to work these....clopping cloppers...let alone magic scrolls...

[The pony waves his hooves at the scroll. Less a means of saying hi and more a frantic showing of what he's dealing with.]

So uh...hi...I think. The name's Crmsn...like the color sans the vowels...admittedly this is kind of new for me. I've been a lot of things, seen a lot of things...been a lot of places too, but "vibrantly colored pony land" is definitely new. [He looks off a little, rubbing his chin thoughtfully and looking a little more distant.] Never've tried hay before, haymakers sure, but I've never been too much into the bit and bridle fanci-[He stops and clears his throat abruptly, straightening up as he remembers he's still on camera.]

Er...sorry.

[He awkwardly begins to jab at the scroll.]

Now...how to turn it off.....

I think, given everything that's happened the past few weeks, we should put our heads together and share what else might have come up since then. The better-armed we are with knowledge, the better-prepared we are for anything else that might happen in the future. Anything that may have happened which was out of the ordinary or any sightings of any kind, outside of Nightmare Night herself.

[Hi, Don. Why do you look slightly uncomfortable?]

I may as well open up the questions. Did...anypony have any moments during Nightmare Night where they had blank spots in their memory that they can't reconcile events with? For example, that they were in one place, but then blanked out and found themselves elsewhere entirely? If so, was it caused by Nightmare Night? If not, do we know why or how?

[He swallows at this last part. Even though his throat is dry.]

And...lastly, I'm wondering also...if any of you have seen Surprise lately. For those of you who might not know who that is, she's white with a yellow mane, and she has a bit of an accent. If you have, just...I know she's not necessarily big on using scrolls unless she thinks its fairly important. Just...you know...just pass on that I wanted to check up on her since I haven't seen her in a bit. If anypony sees her, I mean.

Otherwise, don't worry about it.

[Because he was going to. No sign of her since before Nightmare Night. She never did come to see him.

But he would rather not say it out loud and cause more worry or tension. Everyone was worried enough as it was.]

[Visual]

A video message flips on to everyone with a scroll. However, what the image is suppose to be isn't too clear. Well, not so much clear as it is pink. There's nothing but pink filling up the whole of the screen. And there's a ruffling sound. Maybe some crinkling. It's really hard to tell what's going on. The image is shaky at times, as the noises continue, but there's no change after several minutes. Just what is going on?

[Action]

What is going on indeed. If you happen to be strolling through town, you may notice a rather large pink ball of fluff wondering the streets. With a face. Yes, that ball of fluff is actually a pony, Fluffle Puff, who arrived today. She was even given a scroll already. Which she is currently chewing on as she walks around. Hopefully the scrolls can stand the wear and tear of a hungry pony.

visual/action


[ So the deal here is; he thinks he's not even been gone. Maybe a few days - you know, he takes random strolls in the woods and finds himself lost for a few days before he end up back somewhere familiar.

So when he peeks onto the scrool today, that's exactly the case. He's not aware that he's been away for... a bit over a month. ]

Howdy!

I think I'm getting the hang of finding my way 'round the woods now.

What's been a'goin' while I've been off?

[ Because there is obviously nothing that can tell him that "you've been gone longer than a few days this time" is there.

Well, he'll just poke his head out of the brush and head over to town then, to catch up on the week (he thinks) he missed. ]

[At first, there's only silence. Well, relative silence. If you listen closely, you could here a bit of awkward shuffling in the background, with the occasional distant mumble of "Where the heck did I put that thing?" coupled with a lengthy string of colorful and creative curses. Eventually, the background noise subsides. There's a sound of a needle hitting a record and...]

[Music. Well, for a certain value of the term, anyhow. The audio quality's fairly subpar, like somebody dragged the record player out of the trash, and the recording pops and skips in places where it probably shouldn't. As the song ends and the music fades away, a voice- raspy and lightly accented- cuts in.]

Gooood afternoon, Ponyville, this is the one and only DJ Pon-3 comin' at ya loud and proud from our own little patch'a heaven, our home away from home! It's three to the PM at the top'a the hour, a let me tell ya it is a scorcher out there today. Looks like the Big C's got it out for us today, eh listeners? But, lucky for all of you, we here at the studio are dedicated to providing you with quality entertainment. We're gonna be bringin' you the hits, all day, everyday, whether you like it or not!

So, if y'all got any request, shout-outs, call-outs, knock-outs, drop-outs, smoke-outs, workouts, or you just plain wanna make yourself heard, you go ahead and give us a holler. Remember, Ponyville, we're here for you.

Now, without further adue, this next track's from the Pony of Pop herself, Sapphire Shores, and in this humble DJ's opinion, it definitely stands out against her more recent work. Enjoy.

[A white pony dressed in what looks like the top half of an equine suit and tie stares at whoever may be reading the scroll. His short black mane is slicked back with pomade.]

Pardon me, but does anyone know the whereabouts of one Mr Bertram Wooster? I seem to have lost track of him in the process of being transferred from the kitchen to here.

[when AJ comes on the screen, she looks a little more subdued than usual]

Howdy there, everypony.

Uh. Ah don't wanna make light of all the things that've been happenin' around here lately, yanno? But Ah was wonderin' if anypony would like to help me put together a hoedown, or somethin'. [Pinkie Pie, she's looking at you] T'lift spirits?

[at that, she looks a bit sheepish. did that sound inconsiderate? things like murder don't. usually happen here, at least not that she knows of... AJ rubs her cheek with her hoof]

Yeah, so... Lemme know. Thanks.