Noovesweek Special Report #1

[sailorlaughter]

[HOLY CELESTIA IT'S A GRIZZLY BEAR! A GRIZZLY BEAR IN A CLASSY SUIT-AND-TIE COMBO!]

Good evening, nation. It's me, Stephen the Bear, bringing you the first of our new series: Noovesweek Special Reports! This is a serious one, my friends, so put on your serious hats and meet me at Scroll Three.

[He turns to the side, apparently now being viewed by a different scroll.]

Some of you seem to come from worlds with some weird ideas about romance. Particularly the kind with stallions and stallions or mares and mares. So I'm here to sprinkle some good old-fashioned Equestrian truth-sauce on you: it doesn't matter if someone likes stallions or mares. Love is love, and making other people feel bad about who they're in love with is just plain un-Equestrian. It'd be like if I liked blueberry pie, but Applejack liked apple pie, and I told everyone she was a bad pony because of it! Who am I to stand between Applejack and her delicious, beloved apples, am I right? Let me tell you - it would take a far braver bear than me to do anything like that. That mare can really kick.

So from now on...

[He pulls a board out from somewhere, tiny in his massive claws. It reads:

ON NOTICE:
Racism
The thing where people act like they're the bosses of other people's dating

]

...that kind of behavior is officially on notice.

Comments

[text]

[hattrickery]

Well, you know. You only showed up to explain your position, so you're already a wing up on Dan.

Besides, I make it my policy not to get angry at people for things they can't help, and you made it pretty clear you were raised that way. I mean, I used to be a tremendous racist when I was a kid, so...yeah!

[text]>[visual]

[tinkertytonk]

[That demands a more immediate and incredibly confused response. Bertie switches over to the visual setting.]

A racist... angel? How did that... has this got something to do with that bit you said about god hating all the humans where you're from?

[hattrickery]

Wingshrug.

"We were literally created to look over humans without knowing why. For hundreds of years, the leading theory was that they were childlike and helpless, that without us they'd all be dead in a few years because they couldn't accomplish anything meaningful themselves."

Hayate sits down and folds her wings in tight against her body.

"Of course, it eventually turned out that Celestria created us to prove to her father that humanity was more than that, and with the proper guidance they could leave behind cruelty and hatred and become something more."

Her posture relaxes a little, her wings not pulled in quite so tightly.

"Anyone that struggles to better themselves has me on their side, okay?"

[tinkertytonk]

He's honestly touched and doesn't know what to say for a moment. "And anyone who's trying to sort through all this mad love business has got me on theirs," Bertie offers with a tentative smile. "I was thinking of inviting Harvey out for drinks tonight. Would you mind him bobbing along with us?"

[hattrickery]

Hayate grins.

"That'd be fine! He has a neat hat."

[tinkertytonk]

"Righto! I'll meet you at... at..." Wait. She's not in Canterlot, and he and Harvey are. "Er, Ms. Hayate? Would you care to come to Canterlot until the Gala starts? Happy to pay for you to stay in a hotel out here. It's just that Harvey and I are over here at the moment."

[hattrickery]

"Oh, that sounds neat! I'll be over in a jiffy!"