1st Revenge [Visual]

[angry_jerk]

[Today on the scroll network, the pony community may get the distinct honor of meeting this lovely batpony. The one glaring at the feed.]

Alright, here's how this is gonna work. Whoever is in charge of this vacuous collection of depravity, send me home immediately. Even if you do not, I will be merciful and choose to simply OBLITERATE this asinine carouse of deceit!

If you heed my words and don't try to bilk me of my safe return, I will try and forget that I have been kidnapped against my will, transformed into this abomination, dropped off in some candy coated sinkhole, with-

[He pauses mid-rant.]

On second thought, SCREW THE DEAL! I'LL ERADICATE WHATEVER MALEVOLENT JERKWAD THAT THINKS IT CAN STULIFY ME BY TURNING ME INTO A HORSE! I'll PURVERIZE YOU! I’LL EVISCERATE YOU! I'LL TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB!

[He finally stops to take a deep breath.]

...So, get back to me when you get this.

...I'm Dan.

Comments

[polyturtle]

Uh huh.

[Not impressed. Actually, its kind of pathetic, and its very clear from Don's face that he's barely moved by Dan's increasingly loud insults.]

[angry_jerk]

YOU ARROGANT SLIME! YOU WORTHLESS, SPINELESS NEANDERTHALL! DIE IN A GLORIOUS FIRE OF A THOUSAND DEATHS!

[polyturtle]

[At this, Don goes away for a few seconds, then comes back and looks...no, he still looks unimpressed. But with the slightest of smirks, as he began to have...something of an understanding of what this guy was.]

Sorry, for a second I thought that whining sound was the teapot I put on.

[Dan do you really want to threaten him with death? Do you really think he's even afraid of anything you can threaten him with?]

[angry_jerk]

[Yes Dan is practically spasming everywhere in pure rage. He needs a perfect, insulting response to get the upper hand here.]

TEA IS FOR COMMUNISTS!

[polyturtle]

[Oh, hey, he did get a cup of tea while he was gone! Which he casually sips.]

So are chin goatees. I watched cartoons as a kid too.

[By the way, that's sarcasm.]

[angry_jerk]

CHIN GOATEES ARE STYLISH AND COMING BACK IN STYLE!

[polyturtle]

I think you're just saying that because you missed a spot.

[angry_jerk]

YOUR... FACE... IS MISSING A.... FIST IN YOUR JAW!!!

[polyturtle]

Which you will fail at delivering.

Horses don't have fists.

[Duh.]

[angry_jerk]

I'M NOT A HORSE! I JUST HAVE THE BODY OF ONE!

[polyturtle]

My point exactly.