[Visual] What a friendly greeting.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

What the fuck...?

[Have a very confused pegasus staring at the scroll. And pawing at it - hoofing at it? He even seems a bit... scared by it. If he can't figure out the technology behind it, it must be evil.]

What's going on? I... wha... [He flaps his wings nervously and fidgets.] Fai! Fai, where- where's Fai!? And Feli, and- fuck, where's the school!?

....Why the fuck am I a horse!?

Comments

[io_non_ti_invidio]

Mutant aliens must be weird. [But it's a testament to Fai's hard work that he doesn't really complain too much about the idea.] Human mutants have lots of different powers. I make loud noises, and I can run really fast. My brother runs fact like me, but he can't do the screaming thing. And my boyfriend can control minds. [Pause. Frown.] I mean ex-boyfriend.

[whickers]

[Head on hooves, now she's thoroughly interested] How strange, all the humans I met in Mayfield had no real powers--some were good at making things and the ones with powers weren't human. Hmn--Oh you mean matesprit or kismesis? A mind controller would make an interesting kismesis.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

A mate... kiss... what?

Are there words in English for those? [Because he assumes Strange Horned Alien Cat Horse Thing does not speak Italian?]

[whickers]

Matesprit--humans call that love? Romantic love. [She waves a hoof] I mean, I don't use the quadrants but it's easier to name with. Matesprit is love with passion--mating fondness. Kismesis is hate with mating fondness--well not fondness but--lust? And don't tell me humans can't do it, the most romantic kismesises I know are humans.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

[...He has officially learned a proper word for hatesex relationships. Huh.

And he's filing it away to hopefully never use.]

It's... romantic. Really romantic. [His face heats up.] Mating fondness sounds right for it too.

[whickers]

Well then, I'm sorry your quadrant didn't work out. It's never fun to try and get into a relationship only for it not to work out. At least humans aren't under threat of death! Cheer up, plenty of ponies in the pasture.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

...You were under threat of death to date?

[Well if that doesn't snap him out of any pretense of edginess. Have a look of genuine concern.]

[whickers]

...To mate. Have relationships that--consummated--you're a wriggler I'm not going to. [She never likes explaining this, don't make explain, she was so awkward when Dave asked] It was the way things were on our world--so that our race continued.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

...You were under threat of death to have s... oh.

[Oh he'll just. die of embarrassment no big deal.]

That's sick.

[whickers]

That's life. You grow up fast on Alternia. I'm sorry--I shouldn't have brought it up. Humans don't deal with it and wrigglers shouldn't have to hear.

I've not heard of a Fai or Feli, but I will keep an eye out.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

I... I guess I take that stuff for granted. It must be scary on your planet.

[And gross.]

I don't know what they'd look like here, but.. Fai is bigger than me, and he's blond with blue eyes that turn yellow when he controls people's minds. And Feli is smaller than me, he's my little brother and he's got ginger hair and brown eyes. And a curl like mine, but smaller.

[Wait...

...He actually still has a curl. BRB sitting and just staring at what little he can see of his mane.]

[whickers]

No more scary than the rest of my world. [She takes in the description, even if it might turn to be useless. She's green, not grey, but who knows] Well--Are you alright?

[io_non_ti_invidio]

[...He raises a hoof to knock against his face.]

I just can't believe whatever turned me into a horse thought I'd need my shitty curl.

[whickers]

Is there a purroblem with the curl?

[io_non_ti_invidio]

No, it- it's complicated. And fucking stupid. Just... ignore it.

[whickers]

As you like. Anything I can do to make your...sudden appearance any easier?

[io_non_ti_invidio]

...Do you know anyone who can teach me how to fly? I tried to, but- [He averts his eyes.] -I'm pretty sure I broke more shit than I'm supposed to be able to.

[whickers]

You probably want Rainbow Dash. I know Bertie but...

He's a good person but not the best pegasus.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

Okay. I guess that helps. [He spreads his wings smoothly.] So... winged horses and unicorns, those are normal around here? I bet some little girl somewhere would love to watch this.

[It's just like that one TV show he's never heard of because he hates TV.]

[whickers]

Very normal. There's some dragons and such around here too and I wouldn't go into the forest. I was warned of that by a very reliable source.

[io_non_ti_invidio]

...Dragons? [Wow wilting now that is terrifying.] Like fire-breathing dragons?

[whickers]

I guess so? I'm not actually sure. You'd have to ask around