Kickoff [Video/Massive Audio later]

[like_a_dragon]

[A green pony with a matted down brown mop-top appears on the scroll. From the furrowed brows, flared nostrils and fierce grimace, she does not appear... pleased.]

WHAT THE TARTARUS IS GOING ON HERE!?

[Taking a step away from the scroll would probably be a good idea...]

I can't even begin to count all the things that is wrong here! I mean, at first I thought this was a dream but then when somepony actually pinched me -- WITH THEIR MOUTH NO LESS -- I knew that this was actually real. Talking ponies? And the ones with wings? EVEN ONES WITH MAGIC HORNS?? I even saw one that brought in a raincloud! IT WAS RIGHT ON TOP OF ME!!

[She takes a moment and her hoof comes up to scrub off her hair and her face.]

Alright... you know what... considering everything else I have seen before a world of talking ponies is actually not that out there. And, hey, at least my fur color is one that I'd like. Just, in this case, I hope my friends aren't here to have this happen to them.

Also, I have to ask just one question...

Why couldn't I have been one of those cool ones with the wings?

EDIT:

[A little bit later there is a shout. A glorious shout. A mighty shout. It rings to the heavens and may even be heard as far as way as The Crystal Kingdom.]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN PONIES DON'T EAT MEAT?!!!!

[Thanks, Teddie.]

EDIT: x2

[And a little bit after that there is another shout, though not quite as powerful, whatever is doing it definitely has a healthy set of lungs.]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S NO TV?!!

[Thanks, Rise.]

Comments

[like_a_dragon]

[Her head and shoulders slump.]

You're right. I'm sorry, Teddie. I'm just freaking out a little. It's bad enough that I'm no longer in Inaba, but I am now this...

[She raises a hoof.]

...this form, and I can't make heads or tails of it.

I think hearing that I can't have meat anymore was enough to drive me over the edge.

[kingofthetvworld]

[...Oh, that's right. Teddie got so excited over seeing a friend again, it didn't even occur to him how she must be feeling right now. Yu and Yukiko were already here when he arrived and have long since adjusted, and Rise seemed to handle things okay. He never thought how much impact it could have on someone...

He takes a moment to think things over before he's all smiles again.]

I keep my key to the room under my pillow in the Agency building. It's in the closet, you can't miss it. If you can find it, take it to the commune and look for the same door number that's on the key. I mean, if you wanna do all this before heading over here, you can take some jerky with you for the trip! I'll just tell Kyo-chan it was part of my share.

[Please don't make him regret this.]

[like_a_dragon]

[Directions? That was directions, wasn't it. Still...]

Thanks, Ted. But I still have some meat gum with me. If I ever need to eat something I'll just chew a little bit of that.

[See? It's not all about meat all the time.]

[kingofthetvworld]

[It's not?! Well, whatever, Teddie will happily take that answer, too.]

Okay, good.

[He finally takes the time to remove his suit head, just so he can shove his face into the scroll and show off his sharp teeth.]

Look, see? I wasn't kidding when I said I needed it, I don't think I was made for grass sandwiches. I'm gonna be outta luck when the jerky runs out.

[like_a_dragon]

...Teddie what are you...

...

Oh...

You're a bear. [Within a bear?]

[kingofthetvworld]

What else would I be...?

[Chie plz]

[like_a_dragon]

Well, I don't know... I guess I was expecting the same cute face when you popped off that head.

[kingofthetvworld]

[...

...


...]

ARE YOU SAYING I'M NOT CUTE ANYMORE?!

[That's worse than the meat thing! Why didn't anyone tell him he wasn't cute?!]

[like_a_dragon]

[Crap.]

You're still cute! You're just the same cute as a human!

You're cute as a bear, now!!

[Wait.]

[kingofthetvworld]

You really mean that?

[He doesn't want to be ugly, Chie. He's seen some of the bears around here. They aren't pretty.]

[like_a_dragon]

[Ooh yeah.]

Sure! You just took me by surprise, is all. I was expecting human you, not bear you.

[She lets out a tired, exasperated sigh.] Sheesh. Nothing here makes sense...

[kingofthetvworld]

That's okay, I expected the same thing! Can you bearlieve how rude someone's gotta be to just change your body without asking-

[wait]

I take that back, please don't hit me.

[like_a_dragon]

Why would I hit you? I was going to agree with you.

It's not like you were the one that made me into a pony.

Right?

[kingofthetvworld]

...What if I did and didn't even know it?!

[The plot twist of the century.]

I apologize in advance if that turns out to be the case.

[like_a_dragon]

I think that's giving you too much credit.

We thought you set up the Arena too, and it was nothing you could do even if you wanted.

[And that was a comfort.]

[kingofthetvworld]

[Well, here it comes, the first clue that something might not be right here. Well, besides the whole pony thing.]

...The what now?

[like_a_dragon]

You remember, right? The tournament? General Teddie? The Shadow Operatives?

[Especially since he was all but kidnapped. I mean how do you forget THAT part?]

[kingofthetvworld]

[Why was he a general? General of what? ...Scoring? He hopes it's scoring.]

N-Noooooooooo? Did I win this so called tournament?

[like_a_dragon]

...you seriously don't remember?

[THERE IS SOMEPONY SHE KNOWS THAT WOULD BE VERY SAD ABOUT THIS.]

[kingofthetvworld]

[HE'D BE SO SORRY IF ONLY HE KNEW]

Nope, nadda. I'd definitely remember being in a tournament. ...Unless the heavyweight champion knocked me out in the final round...

[Because he'd totally get that far. And be a heavyweight.]

Maybe I'm still knocked out and this is just one big Teddie dream! Chie-chan, quick! Make me pinch myself!

[like_a_dragon]

[Yeeeeah, no.]

Uh... okay?

Teddie, I want you to pinch yourself.

[Dramatic finger point? Ugh, she's so bad at giving orders.]

[kingofthetvworld]

[And of course he pinches himself, and of course it hurts.]

This is one realistic dream!

[like_a_dragon]

THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S NOT A DREAM, NUMBSKULL!!

[kingofthetvworld]

I see someone's jealous I made it to the final round!

[Teddie why?]

[like_a_dragon]

...oh, do you want to give me a go? I have no problem with a friendly duel.

[To the death]