mylittlejamjar | HOOVESWEEK 6

HOOVESWEEK 6

[Morning, Equestrians! It’s that time again, and the newsponies have a new, fresh stock of Equestria's most-read magazine!]

Princess Celestia's darkest secrets are revealed under the veil of the scrolls! She was in fact corrupted like Nightmare Moon this entire time!? She and the legendary Star Swirl were on intimate terms!? And then she might have tried to murder him after he refused to support her!? And why not tell the populace instead of just the newcomer ponies!?

Well, maybe the dragon she's now dating - maybe all of us should watch out! After all, as the saying goes, "with friends like these"...

Other Top Stories Include:

Title: The REAL Truth About Princess Celestia
by Anonymouse

Title: The Griffaltar Goof
by Roberts Robin

Title: Equestria's Sleeping Scourge
by Eggs Benedict

Title: Good Morning, Night Market
by Tom Bronco

BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE:

-Our Essay Contest winners are announced! The five grand prize essays are in this current issue, and they include writings about why cats don't like ponies, how 'humans' stole from ponies, and the lengths some off-worlders will go to incite violence in the pony population.
-A further look at the deteriorating conditions in Griffaltar. The drought may be over, but the heat in the Roc - the country's seat of government - is on. Protests and calls for free elections now threaten the current council's position as a result of mishandling, and one must wonder if this bodes well for our own rulers.
-A photo gallery of some of the strange species that appeared over the course of a week. Why were they here and where did they go?
-A report on the auction of the year, and some of the surprising treasures our reporters bought from it.
-The official confirmation of Tom Shanks' now-very timely movie, now known to be about Princess Celestia's youth.
-A retrospective about the Grand Galloping Gala, and some of its best and worst fashions.
-A review of Manehattan's newest and hottest eatery, a gastropub called The Hoof and Flowers! Everypony from across Equestria who is anypony will be knocking down the doors to this place, according to the famous food expert who ate there, and a franchise to spread the word would be a great idea.

So come one, come all, and read HOOVESWEEK! Only 5 bits a copy - now and forever!

((OOC: For those three winners among the playerbase, they recieved their copy of Hoovesweek the night before the issue hit stands, as well as a Hoovesweek badge card good for the day of April 28. Obviously, they will notice that their essays are...a bit different than what they remember writing. Ah, the joys of editing!

Also, as usual, feel free to react, or comment on those stories, or even make up seeing others in this issue!

Original picture credit is here.))

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Down at Otsuki Chacha, things were slow so Saori had time to pick up several copies of this horrible magazine. It disturbed her that there were photos of the past week but the fact they knew about Celestia's private message to them troubled her. She didn't want to believe there was a mole amongst her fellow other-worlders. While she wasn't for complete censorship, she wished this thing would die in a fire.

Though there was one photo that caught her attention and spared. It featured Saori, Margulis and his boyfriend Lee, all in human form, together. It was a shame the tablet she got in Exsilium never came over to Equestria so this was the only photo she had of the three of them.

She ripped out pages from the issues and folded them into paper airplanes with her unicorn magic. The planes floated in the air over the shop to only be shot down by a fox made out of smoke.

"That damn magazine. They got a lot of nerve to imply we're warmongering invaders. They don't even know what our worlds are like, so who are they to judge us?"

Edited 2014-04-19 08:52 (UTC)

Meanwhile, Don was drinking tea in the main room, when he saw paper airplanes showering the sky, only to be smacked down to the ground.

"Hoovesweek?"

"The one and only. I feel like with each world I land in, the hostility between the natives and us gets worse," Saori snorted. She struck down the last pages and went back behind the counter.

"It just makes you wonder just how they're getting their information and those photos. I would've been able to sense them. And really, they think the Night Market is the Princess's way of forming an invasion army? Ridiculous."

"Its how tabloids work," Don shrugged. "Personally, I haven't met with much hostility, myself. Though, all things considered, I guess it depends on your definition of 'much'."

Sip.

"Though...the part about distorting Celestia's story...that is worrying how they could have gotten it."

Edited 2014-04-21 00:13 (UTC)

"Well, the last world I was in, we were brought in to help a rebellion force to take down the oppressive super-power that controlled most of the Earth. So you could imagine how often the locals threw us under the bus when they fought back. And unfortunately we can't just stomp our way into Hoovesweek, or else they'd use it to add more fuel to the fire. As much as I hate to say it, our best option is to ignore them and try our best to maintain a good relationship with the locals." She took a sip of her own tea. When Don brought up Celestia's story, she sighed.

"That's been worrying me the most. Based on my experience, communication devices require someone who's a pro at hacking or, as much as I don't want to say this, someone's been feeding them information. I might have to look and see if such spells are possible first. I can understand if someone is upset with Celestia holding back such a story from us but...to go to Hoovesweek?"

Edited 2014-04-21 06:38 (UTC)

"I guess the question is who would have a reason to do so." Don brought a hoof up at his chin. "It would be easy to blame, say, someone like Zetta or Chrysalis. But Chrysalis isn't much of a position to do anything, and..." Don couldn't help but smile just a little. "Its not Zetta's style to do this. He'd just cackle madly in the town square and say whatever it is he wanted to say. And maybe throw things at ponies."

"I can't say I've met Chrysalis yet but I'm guessing Zetta's Mr. Cheesy Villain Act? Yeah, I've seen him before and he doesn't ping me as our snitch. Whoever they are, they clearly have something against one of us, or all of us and the Princesses. If they wanted us gone though, there are much better and faster options. I guess we can hope that those who 'won' the essay contest might be able to dig up something about Hoovesweek." There were so many possibilities it'd made her head spin a bit.

"Same. Maybe they have a mind to go looking," Don replied. "I agree, though. I hope someone does."

Of all the times for a customer to walk in, Nephenee picked the best, right in time to see one of the airplanes fall from the air like a rock and to hear the tail end of Saori's comment.

"Who said what now?"

"Hoovesweek is back with their slander and lies," Saori said with a frustrated sigh. It would be easy to go over there and beat down everypony associated with that magazine but that would add more oil to the fire. She took a sip of her cup of tea to help calm herself down.

"It sounds like they're trying to plant doubt into the native ponies about their princesses. They even accused the Night Market as a gathering place for an army ready to invade among other things."

Nephenee echoed that sigh, trotting up to her. "Sure sounds like it...can Ah see? Normally Ah wouldn't, but Ah wanna see if Ah need to try to head anythin' off or prepare for somethin'. Ain't like we ain't had trouble before from 'em."

"Hmm, let me see if I have a copy still intact." She ducked her head under the counter and pulled it out. "You're in luck. Feel free to do whatever you like to it when you're done. While I don't condone burning texts, I think this is a well deserved exception to that rule."

"Thanks, Miss Saori. Ah ain't sure 'lucky' is the right word, given what it is. Back home, books are hard to make, so ya make sure it counts. Kinda sad to see stuff bein' used like this."

She thought to sit down, but turned back to Saori, "May Ah please have some tea? Ah have a feelin' Ah'll need it more than before."

"Agreed. I used to work for a publishing company and my father was a professor. Some of my best memories are of him reading me all sorts of myths and folklore." There was a sad smile on her face as she recalled those days from long ago. No time to wallow in memories though since she has guests.

"Of course. The usual for you, today?" A teapot and cup came down from a shelf through unicorn magic.

"Sounds a lil' like mine. He was jus' a farmer, but he told me old stories an' taught me to read a lil' bit. Still ain't great at it, but Ah've gotten better." Her own smile echoed Saori's as she sat at one of the tables. It was easy to get lost in memories.

"Might need somethin' a mite more calmin', considerin'." She tapped the gossip rag non-too-gently with a hoof, "Whatcha suggest?"

"Let's see...Ooh, I have just the thing: white tea mixed with peppermint. It has a gentler flavor compared to green and black teas but the peppermint adds a nice soothing taste to it."

One of the drawers along side the far left wall opened and a tin can came out and landed in front of Saori. Ah, the perks of unicorn magic. She took off the cover to show Nephenee the silver-hued tea leaves mixed with dried peppermint leaves and let her take in the aroma.

"Oh, Ah do like white tea...got this one Ah bought, got peaches in it, an' it's wrapped in dried marigolds. Real tasty."

Looking at the mix, she sniffed gently, and smiled brightly despite the earlier conversation, "Oh, that smells great. Looks right pretty, too! Should do the trick!"

"Ooh, that sure does sound delicious. Where did you buy it from?" She was always curious about the locals takes on tea and food.

"Sure thing. I'll go get a pot ready. Go ahead and have a seat in the mean time." She got a kettle going and prepared the tea pot. In the meantime, Mana jumped down from his place on the window sill to inspect the guests. Regulars or not, they must give the orange tabby some attention.

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HOOVESWEEK 6

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