[The scroll unfurls to reveal a small but sturdy-looking brown-coated earth pony of middling years, with candyred eyes and a scraggly beard to match his messy black mane.]

Uh, hi. Name's Nemo Vantas. I'm one of the new ponies. As Bertie's probably told everyone by now, I've got Celestia's permission to start a small vegetable farm on one of the unclaimed plots of arable land. We've found the plot we're going to use, it's not that far from the schoolhouse. We've even got a shelter built and we're hoping to improve it soon. I'm calling it Satyagraha Farm.

But the farm isn't just a farm. We're also looking to pursue a communal living experiment for old ponies and new ponies alike. Anyone who wants to can come live and work with us and share what we have. There won't be many rules--all we really ask is that you try and respect everypony.

I guess that's it.

Oh, wait--is there any chance we could talk to someone from Sweet Apple Acres or one of the already established pony farms, just for some advice? All my previous farming experience involves tractors and stuff like that and Bertie...

Bertie is Bertie.

[You know those moments where you see someone in the street on a soap box proposing an idea or philosophy? How they always seem to be spouting some doomsday philosophy or about the state of things in society? Or, you know, merely ranting about whatever happens to wear on their nerves at the time?

Well, someone hasn't gotten the message that soapboxes are generally used for that type of thing, instead one will see Tamaki up on this soapbox he found somewhere being dumped out and figured it a grand platform. A platform to propose his ideas and get things into a state of normalcy again.

Just don't ask how he's managed to figure out his balance so quick, the ridiculously tall and a bit lanky white unicorn standing a little wobbly on his hindlegs while gesturing grandly to the passerbys.]

My new friends of this place! I have come before you in order to put an idea out there, an idea that seems to be sorely lacking in this place which is just a shame to see it without. You see, back home we had a lot of various clubs of pe-... ponies who all came together for a similar cause or activity. These clubs, mind you, were in a more affluent... place, but the idea is certainly something that can work with a little ingenuity and thought!

[He shifts for a moment, producing a rather nice white rose with this whole magic thing, letting it float in front of him for his purposes.]

You see, friends, I was the president of a particular group that specialized in making people happy and relaxed, to let them get away from their troubles and worries. Now, mind you, our club was entirely male, but the concept can absolutely work in a mixed setting. Now what club is this, you may ask, well we were the host club. A group of men who came together in order to entertain and keep company to any who came to our doors. We asked for nothing in return for this service, merely contented in knowing that we made some lucky per-, er, pony happy with our efforts.

[With that he lets the rose fall onto his muzzle, letting it balance there as he produces a scroll of paper. It seems to be filled out with the words "host and/or hostess club" at the top and underneath it two columns, one that has the title of interested customers and one for interested to become a host or hostess. He also manages a pen of some sort, offering it to those passing by.]

All I'd need for you to do is sign this paper if you would be interested in such a thing, whether as a customer or as a host or hostess. If you'd like to help but not be a host or hostess, then let's have a little chat to see what needs to be done. There's absolutely no commitment by signing this, it's merely to feel out who would be interested if I started it up.

[Sometime after the ponies wake up, scrolls and quills suddenly start raining from the sky. Don't worry, its not the ponypocalypse, its just a squadron of flying white ponies dropping them from above.

Once everyone receives one, the scrolls suddenly glow and come to life, its surface revealing the visage of a large white alicorn with rainbow hair and a golden crown, sitting on a large, velvet-upholstered throne. She has a calm, reassuring, regal smile on her face as she speaks, though those who know her better can see the light of worry and concern in her eyes.]

Good afternoon, newponies! I am Princess Celestia.

I've heard of your arrival in Ponyville and of some of the more interesting stories that have come from it. We're...not certain how this phenomenon has occurred, but we here at the royal castle will put our efforts into solving this mystery, and I hope you will help us out as we wish to help you out!

Rest assured, no harm will come to you. Nor, as some of you have worried, are we holding you against your will. On the contrary, you're free to move about Equestria as you please, be it through Ponyville, Los Pegasus or anywhere in between. I only request that you use the scrolls we have provided you to check in from time to time, so that we know where you might be when we figure out the solution to this current situation.

If you have any questions, you are free to ask them of me. If I am not available - and, I will admit, there are times when I can be quite busy - there are many other ponies willing to help you, including the other princesses of Equestria. We are all in this together, after all.

[And then she smiles a little more. Its a much more relaxed smile. The concern is still there, of course.]

But, in the meantime, I'd also like to get to know all of you! I always like to meet new people, after all. I hear we even have a dragon?